


Exhausted

by Moerae



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcoholism, F/F, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-03-15 00:15:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3430853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moerae/pseuds/Moerae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Karkat comes across an exhausted Kanaya.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Exhausted

Karkat could hear her shaky breaths before he saw her. He stopped before he rounded the corner, his fists clenching. He peered around the corner, careful not to make too much noise. He wasn't sure who he would stumble across. 

It could be Rose, drowning her sorrows in yet another bottle. Karkat didn't quite understand the drink and its effects, but he knew it was bad. All he knew was the strain it put on everyone, even Dave, who usually tried to remain calm. Karkat could see how it affected Dave, even though he hid behind his shades. 

Or it could be Terezi, who he had found lying around in a pit of despair a couple of times. He hated to see her like that, so lost and beaten. Terezi, who was usually so outgoing and vibrant. 

It could be Gamzee, who changed his personality in the blink of an eye. He never saw it, but Karkat was certain that Gamzee was tearing himself up inside over murdering his friends and his abuse of Terezi. 

But instead of a curly mop of hair, or pale white hair and the smell of alcohol, or the miserable stench of faygo, Karkat saw Kanaya. 

Her bright red skirt and pale skin contrasted with the dark grey walls of the corridor. Her whole body shook as she clenched her hands shut and opened them slowly. Jade green tears rolled down her porcelain white cheeks as she took long, shaky breaths. Each one was like a dagger to Karkat’s heart. 

All the rom-coms he’d ever seen left his mind as he took a deep breath. 

“Kanaya?” he said gruffly, stepping from behind the corner. 

She looked up in surprise at him, her yellow eyes blurry. Makeup smeared her face and her attempts to wipe the tears away only contributed to her messy makeup. 

It didn’t take Karkat long to cross the short distance between them, and he sat down next to her with a loud thud. 

“Where’s Rose?” he asked in the least tactful way possible. 

“She passed out,” Kanaya answered slowly, her voice still thick with tears. “Again.”

Karkat noticed the subtly vicious nature of how she said ‘again’, but chose not to bring it up. Rose’s drinking was out of control, and he was only just beginning to think of the damage it did to Kanaya. He hardly ever saw her without Rose, and he was beginning to forget that they could be separate.

“Are you okay?” he asked, trying not to sound too harsh. He was trying very hard to soften the naturally harsh tone of his voice. Perhaps yelling was not the best tactic here. Kanaya gave a small, tired smile, resting her head in her arms, her knees up against her chest. She appreciated him asking. 

“Rose has been drinking more,” Kanaya answered, her voice shaking. She looked exhausted up close. Heavy bags rimmed her eyes, and her eyes looked almost as lifeless as those in the dream bubbles. Her smile was weak, and the deep, uneven breaths she took betrayed her exhaustion. Her clothes were wrinkled and Karkat doubted that she put much effort into her appearance today. 

“I’m beginning to think I might be the problem,” she whispered. Karkat didn’t say anything; he just put an arm around her shoulders. He hadn’t noticed how small they were before. She felt fragile, and at this moment he worried that she would break if he wasn't gentle.

“She just keeps drinking, and she won’t listen to me. I keep asking her to stop and she won’t and I don’t know what to do,” Kanaya said, resting her head on Karkat’s shoulder. If she had the energy she might have said more, or she might have been angrier, louder, more alive. 

“I suppose you just have to be there for her,” he replied, each word weighing him down. 

“I’m always there for her, and she just keeps drinking,” she said, tearing up again. Her usual precision in choosing words was gone, as Rose’s drinking took its toll. 

“I don’t think you should take it personally, Kanaya,” Karkat said slowly, not wanting to upset her. “Dave said Rose’s Mom was a drinker, so that’s probably how Rose learned to cope.”

Kanaya nodded, trying to wipe away her tears again. 

“Maybe you should take some time away from Rose?” he suggested quietly. “You guys can’t always be around each other.”

If it were anyone else, Karkat would not be so gentle. But Kanaya was one of his closest friends, and she needed this kindness. He could tell by the way her body sagged into his.

“I’ll even look after her while you’re not around,” he promised, hugging her to him.

They sat like that for a long time, until Kanaya pulled away. 

“I have to go see if Rose is awake,” she announced, standing up. 

“Don’t tell anyone I hugged you,” Karkat said, his heart sinking. He doubted his message got through to Kanaya, or if she’d even been listening.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any tips on how to write the characters more in character, feel free to let me know!


End file.
